r/Damnthatsinteresting
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u/[deleted]
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Dec 01 '22
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Human sized Bat Video
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[removed]
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u/Able_Kaleidoscope_61
Dec 01 '22
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"My eyes are down here!"
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u/split41 Dec 01 '22
Hardest I’ve laughed all day lol. Thanks
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u/Partysaurus_Jess Dec 01 '22
My husband from his office upstairs: “What’s so hysterical down there?”
Texted him this post and wrote “first comment”.
Husband 10 seconds later: [hysterical laughter]
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u/C_Alex_author Dec 01 '22
You actually just made my day. I cackled at you and your husband lol THANK YOU, I needed that today :)
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Dec 01 '22
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/lysergic_Dreems Dec 01 '22
Dude I just watched this special a couple days ago and this part had me full on cackling!
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Dec 01 '22
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u/JaeTheOne Dec 01 '22
How could you NOT notice???
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Dec 01 '22
[deleted]
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u/eszox Dec 01 '22
You were too busy gawking at his babymaker. 😭
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u/TaterMA Dec 01 '22
Those dangling bits are just too human
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u/trippygenx Dec 01 '22
How did I live this long without seeing bat junk? I can't look away now. Totally looks like human kibbles n bits 🧐
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u/Jaded-Mess-5051 Dec 01 '22
I was just thinking that I had no idea until now that bat dongs looked like that. 🤣
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u/BannedinthaUSA Dec 01 '22
That was the FIRST thing I noticed.
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u/Pavement-69 Dec 01 '22
To be fair, they are framed dead center. It would really difficult not to notice the beans and franks first.
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u/goomnaam Dec 01 '22
Howwwww i open the video and the first thing i saw was that so tell me howwwwe
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u/Accurate_Quote_7109 Dec 01 '22
After seeing this, I now completely understand why bats flip over to pee!!😆😆😆😆😆
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u/whenifindthelight Dec 01 '22
I came for the comments and they did not disappoint
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u/DimensionalHomework Dec 01 '22
You couldn't find the light but you sure did find something else
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u/rauls4
Dec 01 '22
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I am not a biologist, but I am pretty sure that's a male.
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u/BannedinthaUSA Dec 01 '22
I'm no pornologist, but I was pretty sure he was gonna Ron Jeremy himself there for a moment.
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u/b_vitamin Dec 01 '22
I’m no virologist, but these folks are standing way too fucking close to a bat.
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u/Bumbleclat Dec 01 '22
I'm more tired than a big dicked bat
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u/Public_Bass3335
Dec 01 '22
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Smh.....He's bigger than me
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Dec 01 '22
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u/Spare-Ad-4558 Dec 01 '22 •
But mine is
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u/Tramkrad Dec 01 '22
This needs to be tagged NSFW for the benefit of any bats scrolling through...
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u/microsoftfool Dec 01 '22
Batman was here...left in shame.
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u/cthaehtouched Dec 01 '22
Oh he’s still here, watching intently from the shadows.
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u/VacaDLuffy Dec 01 '22
Oh god you just reminded me of the comic that showed of batmans shadowy dick outline
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u/Able_Kaleidoscope_61 Dec 01 '22 edited Dec 01 '22
The commentary is awesome...
"Look at his <awkward pause> c...laws."
".. he's got...ya know. I think it's boy!"
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u/Castor_Deus Dec 01 '22
"... I don't know sir, but it looks like a giant-"
"Dick! Take a look outta starboard!"
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u/sekfan1999 Dec 01 '22
BBC
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u/FattyRR Dec 01 '22 •
Big Bat Cock
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u/Altiverses Dec 01 '22
🤨📸
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Dec 01 '22
[deleted]
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u/badger575 Dec 01 '22
And rabies. That's a major threat nobody has ever survived rabies. Someone can get a vaccine after they've been infected. However, if symptoms start to show they will 100% die.
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u/Scrybblyr Dec 01 '22
I got bitten by a feral cat i was rescuing yesterday. They are going to observe the cat just in case. They told me that three people have survived rabies (Albeit in a vegetative state.) So be careful rescuing kittens who are scared in the middle of 14 lanes of highway with no possible chance of getting out alive on their own.
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u/CosmicCreeperz Dec 01 '22
They should have also told you there has not been a single case of cat to human rabies transmission in over 40 years…
Reddit is strangely and obsessively terrified of rabies. I mean, sure horrible disease but from what I have read of the tiny number of total rabies deaths originating in the US (ie not visitors who brought it) they are almost all from bats - all 3 last year were.
So please keep rescuing ornery kittens :)
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u/AlpacaLocks Dec 01 '22
I think it's overblown to emphasize the importance of early treatment, especially in cases involving bats or other biting mammals
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u/chris1096 Dec 01 '22
It's also like 2.5 lbs and maybe a foot and a half long... Dunno why you had to go with a sensationalist title when the animal is cool as hell on its own.
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u/wrongdude91 Dec 01 '22
I've seen this hanging in my backyard. It's fucking huge and looks scary if see it flying in the dark.
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u/LBBB1 Dec 01 '22
Not quite true that a flying fox poses no threat to humans. Flying foxes can spread many viruses to humans. These include Ebola, Marburg virus, Nipah virus, Hendra virus, and Lyssavirus. Any bat can spread viruses to humans. Not to mention histoplasmosis from exposure to guano. Don’t touch bats or spend time close to bats if you can avoid it.
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u/ryan_price497 Dec 01 '22
I didn’t think I’d wake up browse Reddit and see a bats penis today, but here we are.
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u/Lewd_ReadNY Dec 01 '22
I wonder if bats ever ask each other, Why are you acting so humansh*t crazy?
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u/Lazy_Computer_2077 Dec 01 '22
'You're not greedy. You're humanshit insane!'
If you get the reference, props to you
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u/Begravningstider Dec 01 '22
Human sized bat, human sized penis.
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u/Zestyclose-Pay-1889 Dec 01 '22
Ngl...I always thought bats had a retractable penis...
TIL that they do not. It’s just...there...hanging out for all to see.
Now I wonder if it just dangles when they fly...
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u/myassislazy Dec 01 '22
i wonder what happens when he gotta pee? does it come with face wash as a bonus?
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u/talures Dec 01 '22
Do you see the hooks at the wings? He will free a foot (feet), and use the hook(s) to turn and then pee.
English is not my first language, but i hope i managed.
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u/foggyflame Dec 01 '22
YouTube how bats pee. They rotate themselves and pee while hanging from a branch
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Dec 01 '22
They pee downwards just like humans or during flight. Keep in mind many other species of bats aren't that clean and will spread their urine throughout their body to cool down
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u/sampson11911 Dec 01 '22
Today I learned that bat penises look strikingly similar to human penises
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u/UnlikeUday Dec 01 '22
Isn't it a Flying Fox? They're gentle despite their intimidating appearance!
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u/SHREY36904 Dec 01 '22
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this video. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one video. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW
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u/secret_fashmonger Dec 02 '22
What’s crazy is how often this can be used on Reddit. And, I’m a sicko and find it hilarious.
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u/ashu71029 Dec 01 '22 edited Dec 01 '22
Guys should i marked this nsfw? i am going to sleep
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u/anged16 Dec 01 '22
You sick bastards in here better not get any ideas, we’ve already had two years of bullshit because of a bat
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u/SuburbanRafiki Dec 01 '22
the coffee thats being advertised on the chalk board behind the bat is one of the worlds most expensive coffee's because the coffee beans are ingested by a weasel i think, then excreted, giving the coffee it's unique aroma and taste.
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u/onlyfakeproblems Dec 01 '22
The animal is a civet. Not in the weasel family, but similar shape. The coffee tastes nice, but like, so does coffee with cream and sugar.
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u/TheNotSoGreatPumpkin Dec 01 '22
It’s not about the taste as much as it makes rich people feel more exclusive.
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u/SaltedGreenMilk1987 Interested Dec 01 '22
Looks like the bat is leaking ink on the plants below...
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u/InhaleFarts69 Dec 01 '22
Ok, but how/why is he circumcised?
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u/kashmir_stg Dec 01 '22
He’s Jewish????
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u/Granny_Nooooo Dec 01 '22
I'm not gay or anything but I can't stop staring at that big ol' floppy bat dick
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u/iEnj0y Dec 02 '22
Video:Look at that
Me:that Dick
Video:oh i love those
Me: those balls?
literally entire video all i see is balls and dik hanging.
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u/Kobe_Wan_Jabroni Dec 01 '22
what has little black balls and hangs upsidedown? a bat. what has big black balls and hangs up?...this bat
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u/xpietoe42 Dec 01 '22
i just learned today that bats have dicks… i never really thought about it, but i guess it makes sense
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u/GammaGoose85 Dec 01 '22
Guess I'm starting my morning off with batdick