r/NoStupidQuestions Sep 24 '22

Girl I met at a bar last night doesn't want to leave apartment

As the title says, after a bit of flirting and kissing at the bar, I brought her to my place and we had some fun. Now it's early in the morning and I'll have to work in 1 hour and she doesn't want to leave because it's 'early and she needs time to wake up'. I don't want to leave someone I barely know alone with my stuff let alone my cat. What should I do, grab her and shove her out? Call the cops? Or has anyone a nice and persuasive way of giving her the message?

Edit: I'm so sorry for not replying sooner, I genuinely thought this would get 2 responses tops, and forgot to check after the situation resolved. I ended up calling work and saying I'll likely be a little later, then convinced her to go home if I call and pay a cab. She was so nice in the bar, the sudden turn of character was crazy to me.

11.0k Upvotes

2.6k

u/Thisconnected Sep 25 '22

Homeless gf acquired

738

u/snakeproof Sep 25 '22

Oh she has a home now.

307

u/Thisconnected Sep 25 '22

Finally a wholesome reddit story

30

u/ishpatoon1982 Sep 25 '22

WE DID IT, REDDIT!

144

u/Supreme0verl0rd Sep 25 '22

I personally am heartwarmed by this story about a generous gentleman taking in a stray pussy.

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5.6k

u/fairbearJf Sep 25 '22 Silver Helpful Take My Energy

Tell her your wife will be home in 10 minutes.

300

u/Stevied1991 Sep 25 '22

Next solve world hunger, please.

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633

u/PM_ME_SOME_SONGS Sep 25 '22

Can I keep you on call for any time I get in a bad situation?

25

u/FirthTy_BiTth Sep 25 '22

What does he look like, your imaginary wife?

109

u/homecookedcouple Sep 25 '22

Tell her your husband will be home in 10 minutes.

375

u/the_poly_poet Sep 25 '22

Sage advice 😆

86

u/CikguLeman Sep 25 '22

barney stinson moment

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u/dillonwren Sep 25 '22

Legendary response.

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3.4k

u/Far-Scheme1190 Sep 25 '22

Don't be vague. Very very specifically tell her that you are leaving at the specific time and she is expected to be ready to leave also. Or call her an Uber and put her in it.

750

u/BigChonkyPP Sep 25 '22

Yeah but thats like lawful good. There are other options. Like calling up your thirstiest friend and just leaving them together.

151

u/Lecterr Sep 25 '22

In your apartment?

85

u/AStealthyRanga All round good bloke ;) Sep 25 '22

Yeah that’s a firm no thank you

47

u/[deleted] Sep 25 '22

Call up your ugly thirsty friend and she will be weirded out and leave.

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4.7k

u/SoftSeaSpider Sep 24 '22

“Hey I’m gonna need to go to work soon, do you think you’ll be all ready to leave in x minutes cause that’s when I’m heading out” or something if you want to be nice about it. Like it gives her a time frame of long she has left to leave

But really don’t you owe her that, you can kick her out. Be more firm about it

1.7k

u/Septemberk Sep 25 '22 Silver Gold

I met a French guy who said he would give them a coffee and a cigarette. Then they would need a shit and leave on their own accord.

561

u/[deleted] Sep 25 '22

[deleted]

602

u/spamalert69 Sep 25 '22

People generally don’t like to shit at new acquaintances’ houses.

127

u/So-Called_Lunatic Sep 25 '22

But holding a coffee shit all the way home....

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u/philosophunc Sep 25 '22

Those people live a privileged life. As I am at the mercy of my bowels. That said. If we've had sexy times shouldn't it be a bit more understandable that I make stinky times?

161

u/Bun_Bunz Sep 25 '22

I poop when and where I have to. I don't understand the stigma of this particular bodily function.

Literally everyone poops

65

u/Guywith2dogs Sep 25 '22

Ya but we don't talk about that...

We do what any proud American would do and we ignore it and pretend it doesn't happen. It's the American way

35

u/KatazaraDream Sep 25 '22

"We don't talk about Poo no no no ...."

...I'm sorry. I hated myself when I typed it.

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u/philosophunc Sep 25 '22

If the world were more like you and I. There'd be less people straining to hold in their poo. Resulting in less stress in the world which, would eventually result in world peace. Let's poo for world peace together.

26

u/nokiacrusher Sep 25 '22

Poolosophy is very underrated

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51

u/Gold-Elderberry-8463 Sep 25 '22

They’d leave because they don’t want to take a poo in a stranger’s bathroom…

27

u/legend_forge Sep 25 '22

Maybe Im old fashioned but if I just did the dirty with someone and they have the balls to complain that I used their toilet then that's a them problem.

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u/1Uplift Sep 25 '22

So fucking French

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1.3k

u/hellyjellybeans Sep 25 '22

Lol this is why it's good practice not to "drink on a school night" if you get a weird clinger you don't have schedule obligations to compete with.

407

u/Boredummmage Sep 25 '22

I kinda want to find out she is homeless…

661

u/zombokie Sep 25 '22

So the term I have heard is hobosexual. It's where someone used one night stands and getting laid as a way of avoiding paying rent. Knew a girl that made it 3 months doing this.

462

u/CommanderInQueefs Sep 25 '22

That's a productive way to get herpes.

129

u/davvidho Sep 25 '22

Or the clap

273

u/JejuneEsculenta Sep 25 '22 Helpful

After three months, she deserves a round of applause!

189

u/TechnoAussie Sep 25 '22

And a round of antibiotics

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u/iwannalynch Sep 25 '22

Man, it's like the middle step between sugar-babying and straight-up prostitution.

143

u/asherdado Sep 25 '22

No, its the step below straight-up prostitution, which is a step below sugar-babying. Sugar babies and most prostitutes are able to support themselves by selling their sex, 'hobosexuals' are basically homeless sex slaves by definition

8

u/Zelldandy Sep 25 '22

Not really slaves. They are pimping themselves out for shelter and it is likely that the other person has no idea they are being used by a hobosexual. Hobosexuals pretend to like people and when the relationship ends, immediately jumps to another person they pretend to like and so on and so forth. It's couch surfing with deception and sex, basically.

24

u/iwannalynch Sep 25 '22

I only say it's a step up because people tend to treat sex workers as less than human, and they're more likely to be subjected to violence. A "hobosexual" can be low-key about the transactional nature of the sex but prostitutes have to ask for money. It definitely sounds like a step down from escorting though.

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u/grilledcakes Sep 25 '22

Used to they were just called rent boys or rent girls. I do like the non gendered hobosexual more though.

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u/Duntchy Sep 25 '22

Sounds like my roommates girlfriend. She's just a guest, ofc. A guest who has barely left the apartment in 8 months.

40

u/pink-mentos Sep 25 '22

jeez, kinda want to try this to see how long i could keep it going. hopefully my life never actually comes to that but it’d be a fun experiment

49

u/downtownpartytime Sep 25 '22

being actually homeless can really motivate you to put in the effort

54

u/asherdado Sep 25 '22

lol its literally just prostitution, you are better off charging $200 for full service hours and $100 for massage hours and just paying for your own place

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u/AdamL480 Sep 25 '22

Hobosexuals 🫤

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u/Kellosian Sep 25 '22

Just go full Hank Hill! Ask her politely, yet firmly, to leave.

16

u/overmonk Sep 25 '22

“And you will have to leave.”

11

u/Mymarathon Sep 25 '22

I would say that's a good way to do it. One time I was at a girl's apartment and were finished having sex like 2am, and cuddling in bed. I was off the next morning so I thought I was gonna sleep over. Then all of the sudden she goes "you're leaving now right..." my mouth kinda dropped, never had anyone kick me out

10

u/PandaBeaarAmy Sep 25 '22

Nah, never phrase it as an option if it isn’t really an option.

“If you’re going to stay over, you will have to be out by x time so I can get to work.”

“I’m going to need to go to work soon, you will need to leave in x minutes. (Opt. I can give/call you a ride).”

7

u/jcdoe Sep 25 '22

OMG this right here is why, when I was single, I never fucked on first dates.

This is not normal, this is a crazy people thing to do. You can usually clock crazy after a week or two. Be kind to yourself, find out if she’s crazy before putting your dick in that.

What a fuckin nightmare!

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952

u/mmohaje Sep 25 '22

Blink twice if you're in trouble and need us to call the cops for you man.

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6.0k

u/arkrunningbear85 Sep 25 '22

OP Hasn't replied to a single comment and the hour is almost up.
He's either Dead, Fighting her, or explaining shit to the cops.
Either way, yikes.

788

u/Due-Collection1911 Sep 25 '22

Right?? I really need to know what’s up here😭

867

u/Sora26 Sep 25 '22

They’re getting married next Saturday

166

u/Lord_Dumass Your question is stupid Sep 25 '22

Don't forget to invite me.

73

u/Wookard Sep 25 '22

Where are they registered? How do we know where to buy gifts?

50

u/TheG00dFather Sep 25 '22

I'm just bringing a card and cash as usual. Where are we meeting??

42

u/ThaneOfCawdorrr Sep 25 '22

It's "casual dress," right? Or is this one of those Hawaiian-themed things again?

22

u/wife_liliths_OF_mod Sep 25 '22

I thought it was "attire optional"

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u/Orcus424 Sep 25 '22

They have over 880k in post karma. I think we were told a fake story for some fake internet points.

150

u/SpaceForceAwakens Sep 25 '22

I dunno, man. This same thing happened to me a few years ago. Turns out the girl was borderline homeless and couch surfing. She thought maybe she could somehow ingratiate herself into staying with me. My housemate wasn't having it.

I was sad, she was otherwise kinda cool, but this kind of manipulation isn't healthy for anyone.

77

u/Monarc73 Sep 25 '22

So you mean she was a hobosexual?

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u/pawn_guy Sep 25 '22

This. So many posts here have zero comments from OP because it was a fake question they knew would get traction. Edit: by "here" I mean this sub in general.

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u/LaoBa Sep 25 '22

Or banging.

118

u/CommanderInQueefs Sep 25 '22

Shit. Then she will fall asleep again.

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u/badappl3xxx Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 25 '22

ahhaha fuck every work break to make sure she doesn't wake up while you was working

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u/A1A5KA Sep 25 '22

Keeping it positive! Found the Vag-half-full guy.

15

u/SnooTomatoes9818 Sep 25 '22

I was going to ask does she want to fuck then

39

u/angry-budgie Sep 25 '22

Or at work lmao

14

u/FinalScourge Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 25 '22

He gave up, went to work, and now all of his stuff is gone.

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u/confetti_shrapnel Sep 25 '22

Check his post history. This dude wasn't getting laid.

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u/CodeRaveSleepRepeat Sep 25 '22

Wow he's a car crash of right wing bullshit. I had to make myself stop scrolling before I got really angry.

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u/Pheobe0228 Sep 25 '22

Give hhim time to get to work and settled in.. im sure he will be back.

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u/purplepantsdance Sep 25 '22

If he is not back in five, we should send a team in.

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u/Greenmind76 Sep 25 '22

I allowed someone to be unsupervised in my apartment and they stole my Apple TV. Call her an Uber and give her $5 and tell her to grab Starbucks or something.

386

u/gulaschgel Sep 25 '22

Paying for a taxi was enough but if the situation would ever occur again id totally give her extra 5$ to get rid of her

162

u/Leading-Two5757 Sep 25 '22

Going the taxi route instead of Uber is a low key genius way to ensure you’ll never see her again

89

u/CapitanM Sep 25 '22

There is no uber in my city. What is the difference? Why you don't see her again with taxi but you do with uber?

74

u/54rfhih Sep 25 '22

Uber pay via app; taxi pay at the end of the trip.

Essentially you cover the bill; or force her to but since OP gave her taxi fare its a null point I think.

25

u/Penguiin Sep 25 '22

I think he means if she booked her own Uber for herself then she could see on the app a history of addresses. But if you call a cab there’s no address history anywhere.

41

u/SapphicGarnet Sep 25 '22

I mean, she was at the flat. If she was the sort to turn up at the flat later, she could easily remember where it was.

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u/AlbertaTheBeautiful Sep 25 '22

If you have google maps it can record where you are every second of the day if you want it too. No need to track the address somewhere else at all.

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u/juanprada Sep 25 '22

Why give her any money?

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u/headsr_llo Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 25 '22

“You don’t pay for sex, you pay them to leave.” Snoop Dogg

86

u/JonnyGoodfellow Sep 25 '22

Pretty sure Einstein said that

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u/BumWink Sep 25 '22

1, 2, 3 & to the 4, Ein steiny stein & Dr Dogg is at yo door.

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u/Greenmind76 Sep 25 '22

Because $5 won’t break me and if it gets her our without drama it’s worth it.

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u/blueberry_pandas Sep 25 '22

Because giving someone $5 for coffee if it means they’ll leave peacefully without the cops getting involved is well worth the investment.

One of the biggest things I’ve learned in life is that you don’t win by being petty. No, you shouldn’t have to give someone $5 to leave, but I’d rather lose $5 than get into an argument and potentially have to deal with calling the police and waiting around for them to come and remove someone.

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u/CaptSkinny Sep 25 '22

So she thinks the coffee is for you. When she gets back, the door's locked and you're at work.

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u/Awkward-Broccoli-150 Sep 25 '22

Tell her straight up what you just said, firmly, without any ambiguity. Call them a taxi and pay for it (pay the driver when they understand that they have to take this person to said destination). I once had someone do this to me. It took years to get rid of them completely. It's freeloading or maybe extremely emotionally needy. Either way, not something you want to encourage.

283

u/margiiiwombok Sep 25 '22

I have witnessed my brother go through something similar... a clinger. Stayed the night after a party and then didn't leave for 3 weeks... forced her way into his life and became all sorts of crazy, including "surprise, I'm pregnant with twins" during this 3 weeks. (She was, of course, not pregnant).

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u/pink-mentos Sep 25 '22

the fact that people like her actually exist… like, wow. i’m sure she had it rough bc no level-headed person would do this but… wow 🥴

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u/margiiiwombok Sep 25 '22

She was definitely not level-headed... surely did have lots of issues, but also, who thinks that claiming to be pregnant with twins within weeks is going to work??

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u/nochedetoro Sep 25 '22

I had a one night stand over ten years ago and the dude is still in my bed!

(Jk he got up with our two year old a few minutes ago)

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u/tyytus Sep 25 '22

it’s called a barnacle

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u/Subject-Base6056 Sep 25 '22

Shamefully Ive actually been this person. Didnt wake up in my right head and it just didnt click for like 15 minutes. Then I was like OH FUCKING SHIT, and excused myself. It was neither of those things for me, just drunk, in a different surrounding, not a lot of sleep, and mornings are rough for me anyways.

I apologized but damn thats gotta be annoying for them.

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u/gulaschgel Sep 25 '22

Did exactly that, thank you 👍

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u/pastel-mattel Sep 25 '22

Say “I have to go to work, you need to leave. I’ll call you later.” And hand her her clothes.

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u/BaronVonSlapNuts Sep 25 '22

"Why don't you slip into something a little more comfortable? Like an Uber?"

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u/Sewo959 Sep 25 '22

Please update us!

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u/Sewo959 Sep 25 '22 Wholesome Giggle

and we're not leaving until you do

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u/swallowyourtongue Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 25 '22

This person wants their drama, damn it!

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u/Elevationsikkness Sep 25 '22

Hey there's plenty of us

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u/gulaschgel Sep 25 '22

Convinced her to pack her shit by calling a cab and paying for it

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u/Busy-Tangerine6706 Sep 25 '22

Had this happen once. I called a cab while outside having a smoke. Gave her 20 bucks and said "there's a cab coming, it's very important I get to work soon". She kind of gave me a wtf look and grumbled but I held my ground. She's at least being provided a ride.

If you don't have cash on hand, call an Uber.

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u/s0ftreset Sep 25 '22

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u/SylancerPrime Sep 25 '22

I knew EXACTLY was this was just from that line and I love it.

42

u/readreadreadonreddit Sep 25 '22

Ahahaha, that nose boop and the “ok” preceding that.

Not my usual cup of tea but the juxtaposition of it all and the character of Vivian’s dialogue preceding it = 🤣.

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u/myaskredditalt21 Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 26 '22

fufunny story, first night i hung out with a guy (we had mutuals so there were references) we slept in and i lived an hour away with no transportation, so he left me at his house for an entire workday (which for him was like ~12 hours) and failed to tell anyone.

his roommate came home on his lunch break, which i had not been debriefed on. turns out guy never debriefed roommate.

eventually around hour six in hiding i had to pee and was forced to leave the bedroom/introduce myself to his roommate, since they both happened at once.

anyway, guy and i are engaged now and rounding out 5 years dating. past roommate still treats me like a rando. i am sending good vibes! good luck, op!

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u/NanoPope Sep 24 '22

Tell her you are ordering her an Uber right now.

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u/Rain1dog Sep 25 '22

Tell her you have never been in love like this before. You can’t wait to get off work and hang out all night and then you can’t wait to make breakfast in bed for her. That she is the most breedable woman you’ve ever seen and hopefully you two can start working on having babies after work, but only missionary style because the lord says so.

Then say excuse me I have horrible IBS and you got to go squirt a river of liquid poo which burns your anus so much. You wipe so much at times you got to smear the anus in Vaseline. Tell her not to go in the bathroom for 30 minutes after because if you do you might vomit. If you leave some floating fecal matter in the toilet you are apologizing before hand.

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u/Poinsettia917 Sep 25 '22

It took me three tries before I could finish reading this 🤣🤣🤣💩

This is why I love Reddit.

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u/merRedditor Sep 25 '22

This is why you don't do this on a work night.

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u/CrankyUncleMorty Sep 24 '22

Start recording audio with your phone, in case shit goes sideways

"Get your clothes on. I got grown up responsabilities and I need to leave. Do you want me number, we could hang out again when I have the time."

311

u/RatherNerdy Sep 25 '22

As long as it's in Mr. Krabs' voice, I approve.

80

u/Corno4825 Sep 25 '22

Arrrr har har har har har har!

28

u/Zulu0Hakuka Sep 25 '22

U beautiful bastard u did the laugh 🤣

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u/sirscrote Sep 25 '22

Mr.krabs or a dwarf

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u/notafanofdoors Sep 25 '22

I got grown up responsabilities and I need to leave.

"That's why I didn't plan this out whatsoever"

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u/my__name__is Sep 25 '22

You managed to get her in, you should be able to get her out. Just be insistent. If she straight up refuses to leave then something is up and you can threaten to call the cops.

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u/vr0202 Sep 25 '22

He was hard when he got her in…

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u/[deleted] Sep 25 '22

Tell her you ask Reddit for life advice, that should work.

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u/doctortreehappy Sep 25 '22

Don't ask her to leave, but politely insist that she leaves. If she really refuses to leave, the best option is to call the police. Is she still drunk? You can offer her an Uber home. But if she's just like 'nah I'm staying here', you should get her out before the situation escalates. That's crazy.

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u/human_male_123 Sep 25 '22

Call your boss, tell them you're going to be late, then tell her you want to take her out for breakfast at a great place. When you get her out, run.

26

u/pocahontasmcglinchey Sep 25 '22

Just slip out the back, Jack.

14

u/JejuneEsculenta Sep 25 '22

Make a new plan, Stan.

20

u/banannafreckle Sep 25 '22

Call her a Lyft, Cliff.

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u/LigiaMR Sep 25 '22

I did this once. Works.

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u/reddeadmann Sep 25 '22

Does know where he lives though

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u/LigiaMR Sep 25 '22

True, but one fire at a time...

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u/anal_debauchery Sep 24 '22

Dude dont let her out of ur sight bro she’ll steal ur shit, let her know you “gotta get up n get ready, so im gonna walk you out” give her cash for coffee if u wanna be nice or call her a ride but that’s annoying lik wtf get the hint, Goodluck.

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u/shotwithchris Sep 25 '22

Pour a spoon full of cold water down her ear that’ll wake her up

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u/Grilledcheesus96 Sep 25 '22

Don’t let her stay in your place while you’re not there. No normal person would want to stay in a strangers place while they go to work.

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u/HLR0SE Sep 25 '22

I need to know what happens

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u/gulaschgel Sep 25 '22

Called her a cab and payed for it, also called work that I'm gonna be a bit late

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u/Away_Hair972 Sep 25 '22

Tell her your psycho mob hitman husband is coming home early and you won’t be able to protect her from his cuckhold wrath

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u/Luigi_deathglare Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 25 '22

Yeah, whatever you do don’t leave her alone in your apartment. Not unless you want to be robbed

38

u/brushpickerjoe Sep 25 '22

Front her an 8-ball. You'll never see her again

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u/TheLoadedGoat Sep 25 '22

This is why I, a female, snuck out after they went to sleep. Avoid the morning awkward. Always make ‘em wish you’d stay.

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u/RoohsMama Sep 25 '22

I remember doing this, quietly sneaking out, and just as I was slipping on my shoes the guy sticks his head out like where in the world are you goin… I was up like 5 and it was still dark 🙂

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u/SlightlyIncandescent Sep 25 '22

Genuinely sounds like a good idea TBF. They say for creating music and TV and stuff that you should leave your audience wanting more, why not apply it to this as well.

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u/alroc84 Sep 25 '22

Sounds like you gota keeper

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u/vote4gordo Sep 25 '22

Looks like my ex found someone new! Yay!

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u/Bulky_Scientist9889 Sep 25 '22

Tell her you forgot you're gay and your crazy bf is otw home

15

u/987nevertry Sep 25 '22

This is genius.

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u/[deleted] Sep 25 '22

say you have somewhere to be. idk give her coffee if she has to wake up. i am a girl and i have never wanted to stay in some house long of some person idk well. i had guys order ubers for me but i don't think it was to get rid of me was just nice i think. it seems very odd she doesn't wanna leave. i've had guys not wanna leave either. i think you have to be very direct and then they understand their presence is no longer welcome.

32

u/oJUXo Sep 25 '22 Helpful

OP better update. Sick of you MFs posting stuff like this with zero updates.

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u/gulaschgel Sep 25 '22

Called her a cab and payed for it, also told people at work I'm gonna be bit late

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u/SilentJoe1986 Sep 25 '22

I got to go to work and I don't know you well enough to let you hang at my apartment alone. Please get dressed so I can lock up.

If they don't call the police. After asking to leave and they don't they are trespassing.

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u/SilhouetteCommenter Sep 25 '22

I hope you didn't leave her alone. Definitely turn the light on, open the blinds, and tell her she needs to leave. If she refuses, call the cops and record. Veryyyyy uncomfortable and definitely not gonna bang her again. But now she has your address...so....hopefully you didn't have to call the cops.

7

u/throwaway2323234561 Sep 25 '22

Been in this situation before, I just straight up told her I'm not comfortable leaving her in my house when I barely know her, then gave her a ride home

5

u/kgs1977 Sep 25 '22

"You ain't gotta go home but you can't stay here"

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u/BoxingDad04 Sep 25 '22

I had this happen once with a crazy chick I picked up from the bar. I told her my wife would be home shortly and would f*ck her up if she caught her. The girl left fast af. I wasn’t married I just lied and it worked

18

u/steven-daniels Sep 25 '22

It's been fifty-two minutes. What happened?

19

u/unapproved_dentist Sep 25 '22

I’ve seen this exact post before, almost word for word…

30

u/Zerly Sep 25 '22

OP’s post history is… oof… I defo call fake

18

u/[deleted] Sep 25 '22

Literally just kick her out. Rip the blankets off her, turn on the lights, and start being super noisy

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u/[deleted] Sep 24 '22

[deleted]

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u/Call_Me_At_8675309 Sep 25 '22

always go to their place.

That’s probably the advice she took lol

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u/Tortillafla Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 25 '22

Ask her if she needs a ride and offer to buy her some McDonalds on the drive home. I bet she will leave for free food, and it is the gentlemanly thing to do.

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u/ridingRabbi Sep 25 '22

Record and call police if being nice about it doesn't work.

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u/MrBeer9999 Sep 25 '22

I need to go to work, you have to leave. Do you want coffee and toast before you go?

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u/inappropriate_tee97 Sep 25 '22

Casual sex is weird. One minute you absolutely want them at your place, next thing you know you’re desperately trying to get them out of your place. 🤷‍♀️

16

u/annswertwin Sep 25 '22

Party is over. She leaves when you leave

15

u/am_i_your Sep 25 '22

Leave her alone and come home and find her family moved in and changed the locks

33

u/Jdollarthegreat Sep 24 '22

Kick her out. You are the boss not her.

34

u/Educational-Ad-9189 Sep 25 '22 edited Sep 25 '22

Don't grab and shove her....

DEFINATELY DONT DO THAT.

I'd just say nicely, "I have to leave, we just met last night, I have major trust issues since I was robbed before. I just don't trust you enough right now."

"I want to get to know you in the future", (even if you don't, play it off like that).

Get her out of your room first before making her mad. And then give her a cool down period or just don't answer her calls in the future.

Done.

17

u/BinjaNinja1 Sep 25 '22

Right? Maybe she does just need more sleep and isn’t good at waking up hungover but my friend had that happen where the girl robbed him blind. I wouldn’t be comfortable leaving a virtual stranger in my place. Sorry girl it’s time to go!!

6

u/Particular-Victory26 Sep 25 '22

Can we please have an update, when you’ve got time. Did you get her out?

5

u/holografia Sep 25 '22

Its been an hour! Id love to have an update lol

5

u/unicroop Sep 25 '22

It’s been an hour! We need to know

5

u/_BloodbathAndBeyond Sep 25 '22

Be an adult and tell her to get the fuck out of your house bro

5

u/UnicornsNeedLove2 Sep 25 '22

Don't take a girl home on a day you have to work.

19

u/pfu920 Sep 25 '22

I don’t know her enough to leave her alone with my cat but I ate her raw ass last night. 😂

5

u/thickhipstightlips Sep 25 '22

Sooooo what happened dude ?

3

u/Zoomungus Sep 25 '22

Many years ago I was in the same position, I did kick her out before I left for work but lol she stole my wallet before she left......

3

u/Jetracketer72 Sep 25 '22

Tell us what happend!!!

4

u/iheartstartrek Sep 25 '22

Offer her an Uber home dude

4

u/invadethemoon Sep 25 '22

I’m trying to figure out in what world a person in your scenario would think “I have no time! I’ll ask Reddit what to do!?”

3

u/ShaneVis Sep 25 '22

Tell her you are leaving soon and if she is not ready to go yet cool just DON'T look in the freezer, and explain they aren't body parts and you have never cut up somebody and kept them in your freezer

6

u/gulaschgel Sep 25 '22

Afterwards I'll shout "it puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again" into the cellar

3

u/ARX7 Sep 25 '22

You picked up a hobosexual